Thursday, November 30, 2006

MOVIE REVIEW FOR ":DEJA VU"


















MOVIE REVIEW FOR "DEJA VU"
review and artwork by Phillip Seahorn

Starring:Denzel Washington, Val Kilmer, Paula Patton, Bruce Greenwood, Adam Goldberg
Directed by:Tony Scott
Produced by:Mike Stenson, Chad Oman, Terry Rossio


This movie was one of the better time travel movies I have seen in awhile.And I FIRMLY believe the government has the machine in the movie that allows Washington's character to go back four days in the past.Or something very much like it.

Think about it.How the fuck do they have all this information on the Discovery Channel about dinosaurs?

Dinosaurs lived MILLIONS of years ago, and yet watch one of those Disvovery Channel specials.
There is just too much particular information on the dinosaurs !

It is like they just came back from a fucking exploratory trip to Africa.Those specials just contain TOO MUCH INFORMATION.

I firmly believe that along with the VERY REAL govrernment U.F.O. coverup (GOOGLE :"Bush Sr,'s comments on U.F.O."s) and you'll be surprised at the DOCUMENTED reply he gave to a reporter.

This shit is for real.

And this movie really tells a fascinating "how the fuck will this movie end" type of vibe that will keep your ass in the seat for the 2 hour payoff in the end.

Now, I'm one of the sci-fi geeks, so some motherfuckers are gonna argue some of the points of the movie, like alternate realities and shit.

And wouldn't Denzel get blown the fuck up if he ran into his past (four days) self?So, there ARE plotline logistics that may start cooking some noodles, but all in all a fast paced movie.The photography is excellent, and this time very well lit for the digital format that movies are now being filmed.Somebody in Hollywood figured out that you STILL have to light a fucking movie.

And, this is a "DENZEL" flick, so people won't be disappointed (unlike the last two movies that
he made) and his acting is as consistant as ever.

FINE,FINE is the Creole woman that is his co-star.I am also thankful that this is a New Orleans movie with a Creole person of color in it. They do show the devastation of the 9th ward in the
movie,also.

The DVD wil probably have a lot more on either the movie subject or filming this movie in New Orleans. From what I have gathered in online searches,this movie was made before and after Katrina hit.

Excellent movie.

THE SEAHORN MOVIEMETER:"B"

posted by PHILLIP SEAHORN @ 6:57 PM

Sunday, November 19, 2006

MOVIE REVIEW FOR: "CASINO ROYALE"















MOVIE REVIEW FOR:"CASINO ROYALE"
review and art by Phillip Seahorn
Starring: Daniel Craig, Judi Dench, Mads Mikkelsen, Eva Green and Jeffrey Wright
Directed by: Martin Campbell

I really dislike movie "relaunches".And I REALLY hate it when they mess with fucking classics in movie franchises.

Hell, I can't even call the "Bond" movies classics.

THEY ARE LEGEND.

And you just don't fuck with legends.

I remember that the only movie franchise that I know that has fans of all races in just about every fucking country in the world is the "Bond" franchise.Bond, next to "Captain Kirk", is a fucking worldwide pop icon.

WORLDWIDE!

So, you don't fucking RELAUNCH it!

I don't care if this was the first "Bond" novel.And you just don't , I guses for shits and grins, change the PHYSICAL look of a character.They tried the "blonde Bond" with Roger Moore, which was shit (but I still watched them because they were" Bond "movies).

Daniel Craig just does not work as "Bond".The physical discrepancies are just to obvious.All I thought was, when I watched this new Bond movie, is "when is Bond gonna take off that fucking blonde guy disguise" and the real Bond shows up.

Look, Sean Connery typecast the character.Tall, with black hair.Next to Connery, only Brosnan picked up the mantle and ran with it.

This piece of shit ( a LONG peice of shit at over two hours) was basically a movie with "Bond" characters in it.

IT WAS NOT A FUCKING "BOND" MOVIE!!!!!!

I don't know why all the positive hoopla is being kicked up about this piece of shit.

No, Daniel Craig is NOT the new "Bond".

No, this was NOT a "Bond" movie.

No, this does not deserve the praise for the actor NOR the movie.

Yes, this will kill the franchise after the second movie.

The thing is, I think people needed to believe.And the new "Bond" movie , like the franchise, was something that after the 39 years that I have been watching them, was, at worst, a good movie.

This new piece of shit revolved around two hours of watching motherfuckers PLAY CARDS.
I am not joking.So, if you like "Poker with the Stars", then this is the shit.

Now, as in any "Bond" movie, the photography and locales are always the best in the business.

But the movie did not start out like a regular "Bond" movie.The relationship between Bond and "M" was strangely ( and disturbingly) almost Odeipian in nature.

No fucking gadgets or incredible villians.Well, the bad guyDID fit the typical "Bond" villian, which are always either unusual looking or is unusual in some way to mark them as only being the type of villians that could appear in a "Bond" movie.

I watched this movie twice so I could see if it would be better the second time I watched it.But, it was shit the first time, and even shittier the second time.

I would have went with a unknown to give it a new ,fresh start.They only went with Daniel Craig because some motherucker in "Marketing" told them that they could guarantee asses in seats if they did a "controversial", against type, Bond.

Well, it worked, because I'm writing this (my first) completely negative movie review.I was highly dissapointed.But, the "Bond" people got scared, and after 40 years of a winning franchise,I guess they just couldn't take the chance that a new Bond film would fail.

Well, it did.

THE SEAHORN MOVIEMETER: "C" for overall excellent production





posted by PHILLIP SEAHORN @ 5:44 PM

Sunday, November 12, 2006

MOVIE REVIEW FOR "BORAT"

















MOVIE REVIEW FOR :"BORAT"
art and review by Phillip Seahorn
Starring:Sacha Baron Cohen, Kenneth Devitian, Luenell, Pat Haggerty, Alan Keyes
Directed by:Larry Charles
Produced by:Monica Levinson, Dan Mazer (II), Jay Roach


This movie is funny.This movie does shit which by rights should have gotten the movie a "NC-17" rating.

However, this movie shows America for what it is, especially the Midwest.Racist,ignorant,and the prime example of why the rest of the world hates it.

And people are paying MILLIONS to see and hear this.

Sasha Baron Cohen is the modern day Charlie Chaplin.Cohen is brilliant, and when we see him, I can only think of what Lenny Bruce was to the people in the U.S. in the late fifties and sixties.

A recent review of the movie on television stated that this movie is a horror story.The reviewer was horrified at the racist, ignorant things that Cohen ( who is now in a legal battle because of this) got people to say and be on camera.This movie is one of the best social commentary movies about America in a long time. To hear a drunk, white frat boy say that slavery should be reinstated in the U.S. (and this motherfucker meant EVERY word he said) was when you could hear a pin drop in the theatre. THEY are the motherfuckers that are suing Cohen, on the pretense that they were told that the movie would not be shown in the U.S.

WHAT THE FUCK?!!!??

I don't know how a Brit can have so much insight into the U.S., but I remember a professor I once had who told me to only read foreign newspapers to get the real deal on what is going on in the U.S.

This movie proves it.

Now, as to this movie being the funniest movie ever made.

NOT.

The "Borat" schtick got old ten minutes into the movie. His accent was all over the place. The Kazakhstan racist humor got old REALLY quick.I really was at the movie just to see how outrageous this motherfucker would get.And he delivered. The humor was more cerebral and mocking, with totally outrageous shit thrown in the mix.

However, Cohen should get some kind of award for the fight scene .It was perhaps in the top ten best comedy scenes ever filmed, I'll give him that.

The movie as a whole was a GOOD movie, with elements of the movie that ranks it in the "best ever in movies" category.I think that this is a first for a movie, when the MESSAGE of the movie far surpasses the movie itself.

I have also noticed that the reviews of the movie have been fluctuating between "A" and "B".This is because this movie, in and of itself, is so unique for movie purists.This movie may not be as good of a movie as it is to the "social conscious" movie goers.

But go see this movie.

THE SEAHORN MOVIEMETER:"B-"

posted by PHILLIP SEAHORN @ 5:10 PM

Saturday, November 11, 2006

ED BRADLEY

posted by PHILLIP SEAHORN @ 3:50 PM